Ministries of Mercy - Life Ministries at 6363 9th Avenue North , St. Petersburg, FL 33710 US - Mothers Make Difficult, Defining Choices With Adoption

CLEARWATER - Fifteen-month-old Logan bounces through his Clearwater home with boundless energy. He grabs the family dog’s tail and wrestles the yellow canine to the ground.

His brother, 7-year-old Andrew, sits on the floor with a keyboard between his knees, playing his own tune. His cerebral palsy prevents him from seeing and talking, but he hears just fine. He hears Logan laugh. He hears his parents, Wade and Jamie Ferris, call out to him.

Andrew was born four months premature. He is a triplet. His two siblings didn’t make it. Wade and Jamie were devastated by the difficult pregnancy and their struggle with infertility. Jamie said she still felt like she was meant to be the mother of more children.

“Every time I saw babies I would start to cry. I couldn’t look at them and not die inside,” said Jamie, who had signed up for foster care as another way to fill her desire for a large family. “Now, I feel complete. I’m the mom I thought I was supposed to be.”

That’s because Wade and Jamie were referred to Catholic Charities Adoption Services by a friend of theirs at their church, Calvary Baptist. Catholic Charities put them with a group of about 25 others all interested in adoption. They shared stories, worries, frustrations and joys through the whole process. Three years later, the Ferris’ had been chosen by a birth mother.

Catholic Charities also helps those who want to place their child for adoption. Logan’s birth mother, Michele Morales, knew when she became pregnant with Logan it was going to be difficult. She already had two children who were 11 and 18 years old. She already had a baby whom she decided to place for adoption in 2004 when her ex-husband left her before the baby’s birth. An illness following the adoption eliminated tubal ligation as an option for Morales. One year later, she was pregnant again and in dire circumstances.

She was in her first year of an associate degree in nursing. She could barely support herself, let alone another child.

“It took all of my inner strength to carry the baby to term,” said Morales, 40. “Giving birth is traumatic enough. But to give your baby up is even harder. It is a sacrifice, and it’s hard to do. But it’s all about loving your child.”

Joan Woody, director of Adoption Services for Catholic Charities, said the pool of birth mothers willing to choose adoption is much smaller than the pool of prospective adoptive parents. Catholic Charities’ goal is for the mother to bring the child to term, whether she places the baby for adoption or decides to raise the baby on her own.

Woody said they are working hard to educate women and let them know that adoption is a viable option.

“I tell them to make a pros and a cons list of the differences and similarities (of adoption versus abortion),” said Sharina Noor, Adoption Services specialist. “The decision is up to them at the end. You’re giving a family the ability to parent because they can’t.”

Aside from counseling, Catholic Charities help the birth mothers with prenatal care, social services and finding a mentor. For Morales, Catholic Charities took away her anxiety, struggles and stress.

“When you are pregnant and you have all these decisions to make, you don’t have to worry about it. Catholic Charities comes to your rescue,” said Morales. “It all seemed hopeless until Catholic Charities gave me adoption as an option.”

Catholic Charities places on average 10 babies a year with adoptive parents, who must be between 25 and 45 years old and married at least two years. Under Florida law, the couple must be heterosexual.

The cost for adoptions with Catholic Charities is lower than other agencies in order to make adoption an option for lower to mid-range income families. Adoption fees range from $11,000 to $18,000.

“I don’t know how someone can make that choice for adoption for their child,” said Jamie, tears welling up in her eyes. “But I appreciate that they do.”

For more information on Catholic Charities Adoption Services, contact Woody at 813-631-4393 or e-mail jwoody@ccdosp.org.

Published in the May 11-24, 2007 edition of the Florida Catholic.